Boxers

Boxers

© 1997 Lorne Laliberte

Darling, I'm writing this because I care;
You don't seem to like my loose underwear.

I do know your preference for which briefs I sport,
And you've kindly supplied me a pile of clean shorts.
Those shorts that are sexy look good on your man,
But I just cannot wear them.  I must make a stand!

Believe me, your wishes aren't being ignored,
But I really must watch how my jewels are stored.
If the temperature in my pants rises too high
It'll start killing off all of my little guys.

We both want you pregnant to have a baby,
And to do that I must keep my genitals free.
Not free in the sense that they have human rights,
Can say what they want and stay out late weeknights;
By free I mean that they hang without obstruction,
And thereby avoid spermatozoid destruction.

The tight jockey bulge may be what you find sexy,
But with boxers I know I'm not cooking my testes.
You might like the heat from my balls when we cuddle
But for sperm generation, too much heat means trouble.

When you look at my pants and glimpse a loose thing,
Remember: balls cool in the breeze as they swing.
Cooler balls means I'll have sperm that are stronger,
Can swim a bit farther and last a bit longer.

And once you are pregnant I'm sure you'll agree,
It was worth putting up with these loose pants on me.